Pen-chan has not been returned.
It has been days since then, but it hasnât been returned.
Instead, a shell-like alligator tissue cover is on the bed.
I kiss the tip of its snout.
I really donât know what Miyagi is thinking.
A stuffed penguin instead of me.
A stuffed black cat instead of Miyagi.
I hadnât thought that a tissue cover would come in place of the penguin I had offered, thinking that if we could not sleep together, we would be with each otherâs possessions.
ãWell, this had been âMiyagiâs thingâ longer than Roro-chan, butâ¦ã
More specifically, longer than I have. I have not been Miyagiâs for that long, which means that the crocodile tissue cover are more of a Senpai to me. Whatâs more, even Roro-chan is my Senpai. Both the crocodile and the black cat belonged to Miyagi long before I did.
Haah.
With one sigh, I turn over on the bed without Pen-chan to avoid the sunlight coming in through the window. I stick my palms to the wall separating me and Miyagiâs room and sigh again.
The bed without Pen-chan is large.
The stuffed penguin is tiny compared to a human, but a bed without the one that is always there is full of gaps. A limp crocodile without a box of tissues cannot fill it.
I donât think this can just get the outside.
The whole thing.
I should have gotten it all, even if it was borrowed.
The same goes for the person.
I want all of Miyagi.
ââ Her mind and her body.
Itâs no longer enough to just be on the outside like this alligator here. I know, but I wanted to barter for just a piece of Miyagi, but I canât sleep soundly in the same bed with a limp crocodile with no contents, and I want Pen-chan back.
That one was taken for me by Miyagi and it was cuddly. Not that there is anything wrong with the alligator, but it is time for me to get Pen-chan because I keep thinking about boring things.
The problem is that I canât casually ask for it back.
The Pen-chan I saw in Miyagiâs room was carefully laid out on the bed, and kindly even had a futon covered. I donât know if they slept together, but she was given pillows and treated with such care that it was hard to ask for her back.
And.
I wanted a replacement for Miyagi and this crocodile that was replaced knows what I did to this bed.
What I did here, thinking about Miyagi.
Itâs something that I have told Miyagi, but it isnât something that I would normally talk about with the person who is the subject of it, and itâs something that I would prefer to keep quiet about. Itâs not something that one would speak of unless asked by Miyagi.
But the crocodile knows that I did those things.
If Pen-chan can speak, I would like her to go to Miyagiâs room and tell me what she saw and heard when she comes back to me, but if the crocodile can speak, she must be silenced.
The wide open mouth needs to be wrapped around with duct tape so that it cannot be opened for the rest of its life.
Of course, I know that the crocodile, being a tissue cover, will not speak and report to Miyagi what I did, but it is hard to return this tissue cover considering what the crocodile knows about the night. That said, I am continuing to worry about the treatment of the crocodile, as I donât think I can ask only her to return Pen-chan.
.
I sigh again and let go of my hands, which were attached to the wall. I raise myself up and adjust the crocodileâs body, which is empty.
I get out of bed and look at my phone to see that itâs already time to get ready for lunch. I opened the door and went to the common area, only to be stared at by Miyagi, who was putting a pot on the fire.
ãYouâre late, Sendai-san.ã
ãItâs not even 12 oâclock yet, so itâs not late. In general, if you think itâs late, call out to me.ã
ãI donât have to call you, just come.ã
ãOkay, okay.ã
I replied to Miyagi, who seemed to have nothing but complaints, and looked on the table to see a bag of pasta and a retort meat sauce. I know whatâs on the menu for lunch, but we have maitake and enoki mushrooms in the fridge. I think I could saute the mushrooms in butter and soy sauce and make a Japanese-style pasta.
ãMiyagi. Do you want me to cook lunch?ã
ãItâs fine. Iâll do it, Sendai-san, get the plates out.ã
She says this in a gruff voice, and Miyagi turns her back on me. The pot on the fire shouldnât be something that she have to keep staring at, but she seems to want to look at the pot rather than at me.
ãJust leave it to me.ã
ãI donât want to.ã
When I called out in short reply,ãIf you sit down until the water boils,ãMiyagi sat back in her chair with a look on her face that said she had no choice.
ãSendai-san, you can sit down.ã
I replyãokayãto her curt voice and go to Miyagiâs side without sitting down in the chair. I comb through her black hair and stroke her plumeria earrings with my thumb. When I tried to pull the strings of the hoodie Miyagi is wearing to kiss her cheek, I was pushed on my stomach.
Again, I think.
After Mio left, Miyagi does not like it when I try to kiss her. But it seems that she doesnât want to kiss me, and she kisses me herself and pulls at my clothes as if begging me to kiss her.
Even so, she kicks me when I stroke her flanks or pat her waist, and Miyagi will not kiss me unless I try to kiss her.
Today, she still refused a kiss from me, but Miyagi calls meãSendai-sanãin a low voice and kisses me.
I donât know what sheâs thinking, but Iâm not going to complain because I can kiss her. She allows me to pry open our joined lips and allow my tongue to enter, and she also allows me to entwine our tongues.
Even now, Miyagi and I are still mixed up.
My clothes are being grabbed and pulled.
I parted my lips and looked at Miyagi.
She turns her gaze away, but her clothes are still in my grasp.
This happened because Mio came to this house.
If I want to give a reason for the change in Miyagi, I think thatâs what it is. If that were the case, it would be
Jealousy, is the word that comes to mind.
Miyagi doesnât say anything, but the word seems to fit perfectly, and I canât help but mention the name of my noisy friend.
ãMio said she wanted to eat pizza in Miyagiâs room this time.ã
If I could change Miyagi with this name, I would.
ãâ¦When was that?ã
ãI donât know?ã
ãSheâs not coming for a while, is she?ã
Miyagiâs brow wrinkles.
I donât know if she was jealous or not.
If she says it looks like she just doesnât want to, thatâs what I think it is.
ãPerhaps.ã
ãMaybe, I donât want to hear that. Promise me youâll do something.ã
ãI understand. Iâll tell Mio nicely not to come here for a while.ã
ãThen, swear to the earrings.ã
ãOkay.ã
I reach for Miyagi.
Touching the earrings with my fingertips, I tell her,ãLeave Mio to me,ãand bring her face close to mine. But as a matter of course, I couldnât kiss her earrings because she pressed my forehead. Instead, Miyagi kissed my earrings.
ãWhat are your plans for tomorrow?ã
Miyagi blurts out and stands up.
ãAre you looking forward to White Day?ã
I havenât marked it on my calendar, but tomorrow is White Day. I am glad that she asked me about my plans without me having to say anything.
ãYou said you would do something, Sendai-san. If you wonât plan to do something, we wonât do anything.ã
ãI have plans. I told you on Valentineâs Day that after we made cookies together, I would make you something you wanted to eat, Miyagi. Since weâre here, we can go out together before that. What do you say?ã
ãAre you going out with that neck?ã
I stroke my neck.
There are three marks left by Miyagi so far today.
They are all in visible places.
ãI wear turtlenecks, so I donât mind.ã
There is one attached in a place that may or may not be hidden, but it shouldnât be noticeable unless I put it in a ponytail.
ãYouâre not going anywhere today?ã
There is no answer to tomorrowâs schedule; the conversation turns to todayâs schedule.
ãAre you going out, Miyagi?ã
ãâ¦After dinner, Iâm going to Sendai-sanâs room.ã
Miyagi tells me what she plans to do in the future as if ignoring my words, but I donât complain because that is also how I want to spend my afternoon.
ãNo problem. Do you want to watch a movie?ã
This time, there is aãyesãin response to the question.
Miyagi goes to the pot and opens the lid.
Handing her the pasta, she puts too much into the pot for the two of us.