I Didn’t Even Want to Live, But God Forced Me to Reincarnate!

Starting from the day the quinquennial school festival was announced, our class—or everyone in Harmonia Academy became busy. The study-oriented special classes shifted their focus for the moment for the upcoming festival.
The Alchemia Cafe we wanted to open was still in ‘concept’ as we were still talking about it, especially the menus. Many enthusiasts people chimed in, including those who weren’t so proficient or interested in alchemy. Iris and the other students who loved alchemy became those whose opinions were asked the most.
As for me, Luca, and Kiri, we decided to spend more time sparring together—especially to train our teamwork. Other students in Intermediate Level’s special class volunteered to help us spar.
It was basically the time when our teamwork was at its best.
Even the annual ordinary school festival didn’t have this kind of effect.
I guess that’s just how things will turn out to be if it concerns your good name and reputation, huh?
No wonder my former family really emphasized on their reputation.
Everyone would thrive to have a good reputation.
And there was another unexpected news from my new friends...
“Eh? Really?!” Bewildered, I asked.
“Fufu, yeah. I’m surprised he asked us for something this big,” Valerie answered.
“Isn’t he afraid that we’d mess things up?” Dmitria seemed to be reluctant, but she also seemed happy at the same time.
“Stupid! For the sake of our names and Aneki’s name, we couldn’t afford to mess things up!” Briar scolded Dmitria and seriously said.
“Do your best, Valerie, Dmitria!” I said before adding, “it’s too bad that you’re left out of this, Briar.”
“Well, they have what I don’t. It’s only natural. But I will still do my best in the festival in the way that I can do so Aneki won’t be implicated!”
I smiled helplessly hearing their remarks.
That just showed how far they were willing to go for me (especially Briar).
So, when we first started hanging out together, the other students talked bad about us due to the trio’s past title as [The Troublemaker Trio].
Afraid that their association with me would bring down my name, the trio changed gradually, and I sometimes provided them with advices (or orders, going by Briar’s words).
It was awkward at first, but I was able to chuckle at their behavior in the end.
Perhaps their change was now recognized, or perhaps it was Headmaster Linus’ recognition or even test... that the miracle twins were appointed along with their unusual beast partners to play an important role for the festival’s opening ceremony.
They were asked to open the school festival banner up in the sky at that time.
I believed that another factor to Headmaster Linus’ appointing them for this task was that he believed their mother would come and the miracle twins would never joke around with this, then.
Either way, I was also looking forward to seeing them riding on their respective beast—one peryton and one hippokamp, flying around before opening the banner in a grand way.
As for Briar, although she wasn’t appointed to anything major, she had to participate at the very least in her class.
It was actually the first time she took the festival seriously and decided to participate instead of playing truant that some of her classmates were suspicious of her—perhaps the majority—but a few classmates seemed to welcome her even if it was still with caution, so that she wouldn’t mess things up.
Briar then declared... something embarrassing like this:
“In the name of my Aneki—Lyra-sama, I would work hard and show you the fruits of her teaching!!”
I wanted to dig a hole and crawl to it if I were present when she declared that confidently.
However, I felt happy and warm inside as this might as well be the proof that... my life managed to touch others’ lives, and for the better.
That alone made me glad that I was reincarnated like this.
When I accidentally passed by Headmaster Linus later that day, he stopped me to say a few words.
“What you did with the trio were really good. They really changed for the better. I see the quality of a good educator in you, Lyra. Do you ever think of becoming an educator or someone who plays the role of educating and nurturing others?”
At his words, my mind stopped but for only a while.
I immediately said a few words in response to him, out of formality. Things such as, “I haven’t thought about it yet, but thank you very much for your pointer, Sensei.”
Then, as I walked away, my mind worked in reflection as it usually did.
Such things... I never imagined it, nor did I try to question myself that.
Ever since I was Reinst, I never... had this kind of question.
As I thought that my future was set in stone at that time.
To become the future queen, to become a good wife/noble woman that wouldn’t bring shame to her family, while having the talent of swordsmanship befitting of a Grabberton that I could boast about.
But... I am now Lyra.
Such things in my future... Yes, there is none.
I remembered that Mom and Dad once told all of us that we were free to do what we wanted to do.
So, that would mean we were free to become what we wanted to be, right?
Dad’s successor? Alt-nii is more suitable, and isn’t he studying and training hard to help Dad?
Mom’s successor? Can I become a good head of the royal magicians? But I love swordsmanship so much that fighting with pure magic is unthinkable. Wouldn’t that mean another department suits me more?
Waiting for a good marriage arrangement and becoming a good noble wife? ...I’d like to find someone I really love to be married to, so waiting isn’t an option. And my parents wouldn’t just arrange a marriage for me without asking for my opinion.
So...
Should I really become a teacher? Or at least a tutor? A coach? A magic swordsman? An adventurer? A librarian?
...I don’t know.
I don’t know what’s best for me.
Is it about time I should think about it?
I’m still 11...
No.
I am already 11. An Intermediate Level student, on top of it.
Soon, I will turn 13 and become an adult. I will outlive my past self.
I know that, but why am I denying it?
The thing with Erneste from before made me realize the truth that time passed by so quickly. Therefore, standing still wasn’t an option.
I also need to change for the better.
...Moving on from the past.
That’s what I ought to do, but... How do I start?
Can I just continue to live like this, without changing anything?
Can’t I face the future without doing anything about my past—like, leaving it just as it is?
Will that cause me trouble?
I had spent eleven years of my second life without any major trouble, and I think I’ve changed quite a lot from the time I was Reinst.
But lately, I feel as if I’m stuck.
And thinking of unpleasant things like the unknown future and every bad possibility would cause me to feel so anxious, so uneasy that my head would feel heavy and weird.
But the future is an important matter to think of.
So, I went around to ask other people about their choices.
“I want to roam the world and who knows, maybe I can work something out between the dragons and non-dragons!” Carbuncle said.
“An alchemist...,” Iris said, somehow in a more pessimistic tone of voice compared to when she was a Basic Level student.
“A blacksmith!” Harvey enthusiastically answered.
“The head of the Loera family,” Ein said as a matter of course.
“The head of the royal knights,” Kiri also said something as a matter of course.
“The—”
Before Luca managed to finish his words, I immediately cut him off, “Okay, you’re definitely going to be the king. Next.”
I did that because the last two answers from Ein and Kiri made me realize I probably didn’t have to ask several people here.
Luca closed his mouth and looked at me with irritation, but I immediately turned around and said, “There’s no need for you to state the obvious. It’s my bad to ask this in the first place.”
Before he managed to say anything, the next person answered.
“I’ll probably be the next duke? Well since the Maozi jewel came along, I am not so sure anymore, but helping Dad take care of the family is what I want to do in the future,” Alt-nii said.
“Hmm, let’s see... Becoming an adventurer might be nice. Helping out Master and other werebeasts seems nice too. Something like that,” Clavis also said.
“Me and Valerie would succeed Mother,” Dmitria proudly announced.
“Nicely said,” Valerie nodded.
“Me? If possible, then I’d love to be a dancer,” Even Briar had a dream in her mind, and her dream surprised me a lot.
“You can dance?!” I immediately asked.
“Yes, but I’m not that good...”
“I’d like to see you dance!!”
“I-if Aneki insists...,” Briar bashfully said.
“Will you perform a dance in the festival?” I tilted my head as I asked her.
“No, there isn’t the chance to do so and I never really danced in front of others, except for classes.”
“Why?” I didn’t get it. Briar didn’t seem to be the shy type.
“...Because they’d compare me with my perfect sister. I’d be seen as inferior and I hate that,” Briar muttered.
“...”
I was rendered speechless by her reasoning.
On top of being compared to your own sibling, to be seen as inferior in something you love... it must have been a terrible experience for her. Even so, she still thought of her dream. That must show how much she loves dancing.
“Let me see your dance sometimes, though. I bet it’d be good,” I closed this questioning session with a smile.
“If Aneki wants me to, then that’d be my pleasure!” Briar said with her shining eyes.
...It seemed that I just added more score to Briar’s favorability rating?
“By the way, will everyone be walking together during the festival?” I suddenly thought of another question.
“Depends. When our parents come, we will walk around with them. When they aren’t there, let’s walk around together,” Valerie stated.
“If you all can do that, then sure. When you all have to walk around with your family, I can—,” Briar’s words were abruptly cut.
“Mother told us to drag you around at that time, Boss!” Dmitria chuckled as she patted Briar’s shoulder a bit... hard.
“I’ve already promised my sister to accompany her walk around the school together. And then...,” Kiri seemed like he was almost fully booked? Guess that would include the members of his adoptive family and his biological family.
“My mom will definitely come,” Clavis smiled.
“My parents really want to come if it’s possible for them, as it is quite a rare chance to visit me in school. They also want to see Iris, so...,” Harvey said as he looked at Iris.
“Eh? I-if that’s fine with them,” Iris said.
“I’m not sure yet. Depends on the condition later,” Luca said.
Well, the king and the queen might or might not come. Perhaps they’d be coming incognito?
“Either Mum or Dad will come!” Ein stated, as expected.
“Haha, it seems like everyone’s having arrangements, huh? We will also be with our family members, right, Lyra? Let’s just see how it goes. No need to plan everything out. It’s a fun festival, so let’s let things play out nicely by itself,” Alt-nii said as he patted my shoulder.
“Oh... you’re right, Alt-nii!” I smiled back at him.
It was only natural for each of us to use this rare opportunity to spend the time with other people than our normal circle of friends here in this school. Of course, walking around alone might be a fun option as well, seeing that it would surely be so merry and fun.
My line of questioning continued even after we returned home.
“A famous detective!” Freyr gave an expected answer.
“A princess! A gardener! A farmer!” Freyja gave quite some answers there!
Let’s not mind her dream of becoming a princess since that’s just so typical of girls her age.
It seemed that Freyja liked nature, so she gave the jobs that had something to do with nature.
“A magician is also good!”
“Yes, a great magician!”
The two of them then announced that as well.
If that was the case, they were more suitable in following Mom’s footsteps as a royal magician than me.
I turned towards my parents and asked them on how they decided what they’d like to be.
“I knew I wanted to work at the royal court so that I’d have a good standing in the society. In the past, I was torn between becoming a tutor as I loved learning, or becoming a magician as I really loved using magic. In the end, I was scouted for my talent as a magician, which seemed to be more prominent,” Mom explained.
So, she had an idea on where she was headed to, and managed to accomplish it.
“Well, to be honest, I had no plan at all, but I just happened to become a royal spy and then a duke by fate...,” Dad then thought of something as he added, “perhaps my occupation was all Titus’ decision?”
...Good point, Dad.
So, he ‘accidentally’ got his job as a royal spy when he was thinking of putting an end to his corrupt family, and he ‘accidentally’ became the duke after Titus-sama pestered him to become one.
Perhaps I was more like Dad, who said that he was lost and didn’t know what he wanted to be in the future.
However, things still worked out well for him.
So, I don’t need to really worry about such things?
Or should I still think more about it as it’s something serious that will decide my whole lifetime?
What if I don’t have the kind of luck Dad had...?
As I was about to succumb to my thoughts again, Mom suddenly looked at me as if she remembered something.
“Right. I know you children are busy with the upcoming exams and the big festival, but there’s also an important invitation sent to our family, and it’s on Day 3 Month 6. Will you come?”
“Ah, that’s right. The Grabberton main family’s son’s 22
birthday and also the day when he’s going to be officially declared as the next duke and the head of the family,” Dad added.
“Then I should come, Dad! I’m the eldest son and I’m already known as the Hartmann family’s heir, so it would be bad for me to not show up,” Alt-nii smiled.
“If everyone comes, Freyja is coming as well!”
“Me, too!” Freyr followed his twin sister.
“...”
The Grabberton main family’s son... 22
birthday... be declared as the next... officially...
Dominick Robin Grabberton. Domi. My... past self’s full-blooded little brother.
It’s about time for him to take over the family from Father?
Does that mean he’s also getting married soon?
Speaking of which, I had never asked around about him, for example, who’s his fiancee?
Judging by how the Grabberton family is, he’d definitely have a fiancee.
“Lyra? Will you come?”
Noticing that I was being silent, Mom asked me again.
I turned to look at Mom, and when our eyes met, it felt as if Mom’s gaze contained a meaning that I couldn’t fathom.
Perhaps she had something else in her mind...? Well, being the head of the royal magicians, it’s no wonder if her mind is occupied with other things.
Not wanting for the others to wait for me for too long, I immediately nodded.
“Yes, I will come as well.”
“Then, our family will come in full members,” Dad smiled in satisfaction.
I nodded.
I knew that I was no longer in any place to be thinking of this, nor should I really think of it, but it somehow bothered my mind.
By it... I mean, the thing about Domi.
In his big day, would I be able to learn a few more things about him?
Yes, I am no longer his big sister. I also didn’t really care about him that much when I was alive as Reinst.
Even so...
The thing that bugs me the most is how someone I used to see as a little brother has now grown up way past me and that he’d assume an important role in society soon.
How will he fare against it?
I’d like to see that.
Perhaps I can figure something out about myself, too.
Even so...
Again, everyone else seems to be walking forward, meanwhile...
I am the one getting left behind.
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