I, Am a Living Yama; Empress Advises Me to Stay Calm

She glared at Yang Yi fiercely, seething with anger.
“Then you shouldn’t keep staring at my chest.”
Yang Yi sighed.
“Fine, next time I’ll look at your legs.”
Wu Mingyue blinked in confusion.
“???”
…
A paperboy in a green military uniform carried a thick stack of
as he sold newspapers in the streets and alleys.
“Extra, extra! Shocking secrets of Emperor Qianlong of the Qing Dynasty revealed!”
“Shocking! The Qing Emperor did this to his sister-in-law!”
“Shameless! The top ten dirty secrets of Qianlong!”
The young newsboy’s voice rang out, carrying a series of sensational headlines that immediately captivated the attention of countless passersby.
In any era, the Supreme Emperor represented mystery, nobility, and power. Anything ordinary became extraordinary when associated with him. Many people had never seen the Emperor in their lives, and his privacy was a deadly attraction for the common folk.
“Hey, kid, give me a copy!”
“I want one too, give me two!”
“Give me ten copies!”
The surrounding commoners immediately swarmed around, snatching up all the newspapers. Those who didn’t manage to grab one looked on with envy. This was the emperor’s private life!
Those who did get a copy stood aside, eagerly reading it and clucking their tongues in amazement, making those around them feel as if their hearts were being scratched by a cat.
Scenes like this unfolded throughout Luoyang.
In just half a day, the five hundred thousand copies of the newspaper that Wu Mingyue had meticulously prepared sold out completely.
Of course, it wasn’t just the ordinary people of Luoyang who bought them. Many opportunistic merchants also took notice.
These merchants had a keen sense for profitable ventures, and as soon as they sensed that this edition of
would sell like hotcakes, they rushed to buy it in bulk.
After all, it was the Emperor’s private property!
They purchased tens of thousands of copies at a time. If Wu Mingyue hadn’t prepared millions of copies, they likely wouldn’t have had enough to meet demand.
In just three days, this edition of
flew off the shelves nationwide. Merchants even took copies to other countries, selling them at inflated prices.
Five days later, all of Luoyang knew about Qianlong, who had a penchant for seducing other men’s wives, committing adultery with his sister-in-law, cuckolding his ministers, and engaging in all kinds of heinous acts.
The streets and alleyways buzzed with discussions about Qianlong.
Whether eating or drinking, the first thing people said when they met was,
“Have you heard about Qianlong?”
“What? You haven’t heard of Qianlong? Then you’re really out of touch!”
…
In the Golden Throne Hall, Fu Cha Fu Heng spoke respectfully,
“Your Majesty… General Niohuru Nianqing has returned.”
Qianlong raised his eyebrows, a slight smile creeping onto his somewhat gaunt face.
“Good, it’s good that he’s back. Let him come to see me.”
After so many days of bad news, he finally had something positive to look forward to. Even if it had cost him dearly to get Niohuru Nianqing back, in his view, a trusted and beloved general was worth more than any material possession.
Besides, it was like paying a thousand pieces of gold for a horse’s bones! This would send a message to his officials that as long as they remained loyal, he would spare no expense to ransom them if captured.
Fu Cha Fu Heng nodded.
“I’ve already informed General Niohuru Nianqing. He should be on his way to the palace by now.”
Just as he finished speaking, hurried, chaotic footsteps echoed through the hall. It was clear that whoever was approaching was extremely agitated.
“Your Majesty…” Ertai burst in, his usually composed demeanor shattered.
Qianlong was stunned, a bad premonition rising in his heart. The last time Ertai had been this flustered was when his father had died. In all these years, he had rarely seen Ertai so panicked.
Fu Cha Fu Heng, standing beside him, narrowed his eyes, tension filling the air. Recent troubling issues had already plagued the Qing Dynasty. Could anything else have gone wrong?
Ertai rushed up to Qianlong, panting, his deeply lined face marred by anxiety.
“Your Majesty, something serious has happened.”
Qianlong’s heart sank. “Ertai, what is it?”
Ertai’s grey eyebrows raised slightly, his clouded eyes looking at Qianlong with a complex expression. He shakily handed a newspaper from his chest to Qianlong.
“Your Majesty, please take a look. This is the latest edition of
from the Zhou Dynasty.”
“The
?”
Both Qianlong and Fu Cha Fu Heng were taken aback. They had heard of the popular newspaper produced by the people of Zhou. Even some concubines in the harem collected
However, until now, they hadn’t paid much attention to it. Seeing Ertai’s worried expression, both Qianlong and Fu Cha Fu Heng were puzzled. How could a single issue of the
cause such alarm?
Frowning slightly, Qianlong picked up the newspaper. With a single glance, his expression changed dramatically.
He shouted angrily, “Nonsense! This is utter nonsense!”
Fu Cha Fu Heng, who had stolen a glance, widened his eyes in shock, gasping.
The entire page was filled with articles about Qianlong.
The largest headline screamed, “Exclusive Revelations from Qianlong’s Favourite General Niohuru Nianqing: The Untold Story of the Emperor and His Sister-in-Law.” Other sensational headlines included “Prince Rui’s Heartbreak: Qianlong Spends the Night with the Princess” and “The Secret Story of Qianlong and the Crown Princess,” among many others.
Fu Cha Fu Heng felt as if he might vomit blood after reading it. This was pure slander.
Although Qianlong had many wives, he never pursued affairs with the women close to him. The notion that he had been unfaithful to his sister-in-law or his daughter-in-law was outrageous.
Qianlong’s anger boiled over as he shouted,
“Nonsense! When have I ever done such a thing?”
His eyes were wide open, and bloodshot, his entire face flushed, and the veins on his forehead bulged. His hands gripped the newspaper as if he intended to tear it apart.
“Nonsense! I barely saw Prince Rui’s wife a few times! I am being wronged! This
is full of lies!”
His fury echoed through the hall.
Ertai’s expression turned grave.
“Your Majesty, it is rumored that this edition of the Zhou Dynasty’s
has already sold over a million copies. In the past month, not counting the copies stored by merchants, at least hundreds of thousands of people have read it. If this continues to spread and everyone knows about it, I’m afraid… the rumors will become reality.”
Qianlong’s eyes widened, and he clutched his chest as his vision darkened. He had never expected the
of the Zhou Dynasty to achieve such sales. This felt like a bucket of dirt being poured over him.
His breathing quickened.
“Rumors stop with the sages. I don’t believe the world will believe it after all the manipulation by
.”
Ertai replied bitterly,
“But Niohuru Nianqing has indeed been captured by the Zhou Dynasty.
claims he revealed your secrets out of fear of death. Previous editions of the newspaper detailed the relationship between you and Niohuru Nianqing. Now, with this sudden revelation, even the wisest will be half-believing, let alone the commoners who take every rumor to heart…”