Table Of Content“Losing a loved one to death pushes us into a series of feelings,
beliefs, and behaviors that we try strongly to resist. These are painful
and scary, and we fear that these experiences of our brokenness may
never end. Antonio Sausys has taken [my] ‘tasks of mourning’ and
shows how the simple practices of yoga can help us fulfill these tasks
and bring us the re-integration and relief that we seek. Practicing the
wisdom of this ancient mind-body discipline can help the mourner
begin to integrate [his or her] experiences after loss and to re-establish
a sense of wholeness.”
—J. William Worden, PhD, ABPP, author of Grief
Counseling and Grief Therapy and Children and Grief:
When a Parent Dies
“Provides in-depth understanding of psychosomatic aspects of grief
and guides us through somatopsychic methods of yoga that empower
us to regain our health, inner peace, and happiness.”
—Ananda Balayogi Bhavanani, chairman of ICYER at
Ananda Ashram, Pondicherry, India, and honorary
international advisor to the International Association of
Yoga Therapists, USA, and various Gitananda yoga
associations worldwide
“With compassion and clarity, Antonio Sausys brings dignity to the
grieving process as he guides you, step-by-step, through loss to
transformation and rebirth. Herein lies an important road map for the
difficult rite of passage that we all must face at some point in our
lives.”
—Anodea Judith, PhD, author of Wheels of Life: Eastern
Body, Western Mind
“In this book, Antonio shows us his skillfulness as a master teacher
and skilled yoga therapist who offers us practical and accessible tools
to meet the natural process of grieving. His years of experience in
working with grief through his personal life and work with students
shines through in this very pragmatic manual for how to heal through
grief, not by leaving grief behind, but by moving all the way through it
with love, kindness, and compassion for ourselves, and for what we
have lost.”
—Richard Miller, PhD, psychologist, meditation teacher of
nondualism, and author of The iRest Program for Healing
PTSD and Yoga Nidra: The Meditative Heart of Yoga
“A loving approach to transforming grief and loss. Antonio’s work is
East-West wisdom at its finest.”
—Larry Payne, PhD, founder of Samata International Yoga
and Health Institute; coauthor of Yoga for Dummies and
Yoga Rx and the Business of Teaching Yoga; and director
at Yoga Therapy Rx™ and Prime of Life Yoga™
“The heart of yoga is here in Antonio Sausys’ Yoga for Grief Relief.
Sausys understands grief firsthand, as well as yoga’s capacity to help
us heal from the inside out. Trust Sausys’ deeply intuitive,
compassionate, and authoritative voice as he helps you release the
bodily effects of grief, guides changes in your perception, and opens
you to greater self-awareness. I fully endorse this practice and this
book!”
—Amy Weintraub, founding director of the LifeForce Yoga
Healing Institute and author of Yoga for Depression and
Yoga Skills for Therapists
Publisher’s Note
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with
the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering psychological, financial, legal, or other professional services. If
expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.
Excerpts from Tirukural from WEAVER’S WISDOM by Satguru Sivaya Subramuniyaswami, copyright © 1999 Satguru Sivaya
Subramuniyaswami. Reprinted by permission of Himalayan Academy.
“Physical Anatomy and the Psychic Chakras” (chart) from A CHAKRA & KUNDALINI WORKBOOK by Jonn Mumford, copyright
© 1994 Jonn Mumford. Reprinted by permission of Llewellyn Publications.
Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books
Copyright © 2014 by Antonio Sausys New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
5674 Shattuck Avenue
Oakland, CA 94609
http://www.newharbinger.com
Cover design by Amy Shoup; Text design by Tracy Marie Carlson; Acquired by Jess O’Brien; Edited by Marisa Solis; With the
creative assitance of Elliott Vogel
All Rights Reserved
ePub ISBN: 9781608828203
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data on file
This book is dedicated to my mother, Olga Themis Marun Avisap, who, even in her passing,
gave me more tools than I can comprehend to become the professional I am today. By taking me
lovingly by the hand, as we pierced together through difficulties in life, she prepared me for the
transformation of the grief her loss left behind into who I am today.
Her trust in me encouraged me to take on this journey; her respect for discipline gave me
grounds for persevering when in doubt. I am aware she died concerned about not seeing me
become the man she formed. The unstoppable force of her teachings is a testament to how, while
I did lose her physical presence, she will forever be weaved into the tapestry of my heart.
Wherever you are, Mom, in whatever way you can see me, here it is. …Thank you, again!
Contents
Acknowledgments
Foreword
Introduction
Chapter 1. Grief: A Normal Response to Loss
Defining Grief: The Western View
Four Tasks of Mourning: A Road Map for the Grieving Process
Grief and the Brain
Chapter 2. Yoga and Grief
The Five Spokes on the Wheel of Suffering
Grief’s Challenge to Spirituality
Love Beyond Attachment
Chapter 3. How the Yoga for Grief Relief Practice Works
How This Practice Was Born
The Active Principles of the Practice
How the Practice Functions as a Whole
Chapter 4. What You Can Do: The Yoga Practice
Accepting Life Fully
Complete Breathing (Mahat Yoga Pranayama)
Unblocking the Flow of the Life Force
Energy Flow Series (Pawanmuktasana 1)
Whisking Up the Feelings
Windmill (Vayu Chakram Asana)
Let Go!
Attitude of Discharging (Utthita Lolasana)
Sleep Better and Awaken to a New Perspective
Concentrated Gazing (Tratak)
Control Is Somehow Possible
Alternate-Nostril Breathing (Nadi Shodhana Pranayama)
Bringing Calm to a Scattered Mind and a Distressed Body
Self-Relaxation Technique (Anga Shaithilya)
Dissolving Old Patterns and Reprogramming the Mind with Intention
Resolve (Sankalpa)
Opening to Spirit
Breath Meditation
Chapter 5. Designing the Logistical Aspects of Your Practice
Setting the Intention
Should You Practice Alone or Under Guidance?
Is It Better to Practice Individually or in a Group?
Is It Safe to Do This Practice by Yourself?
Which Exercises Are Best for Me?
Where Should I Practice?
When Should I Practice?
For How Long Should I Practice?
Your Practice Changes as You Do
Chapter 6. The Process of Transformation
Finding a New Identity After Loss
How Can the Transformation Be Accomplished?
What Are the Possible Meanings of Finding a New Identity After Loss?
Conclusion
Glossary
References
Acknowledgments
My deep gratitude goes to Lyn Prashant. Her immense knowledge of the
implications of grief for the body informed and enlightened my understanding of
this difficult time for the human heart. Her insightful mentorship transformed
and enligthened my professional outlook. Her compassion and profound ability
to hold space supported me through the transformation of my own bereavement.
Her gentle yet fierce commitment to the truth of the soul moved me to levels of
depth still manifesting in my life today. Her wisdom and dedication to serving
others inspired my work. I’m honored to have had the opportunity to develop the
seed she planted within me and I thank the universal order for having our paths
meet in this lifetime.
I thank Elliott Vogel, whose patience, dedication, and creative assistance
helped shape my writing while preserving my own voice. His edits translated the
language of my heart into adequate words that now reach the ears of those
willing to listen.
An image is worth a thousand words: My sincere thanks to Bryan Hendon, a
powerful human being with a wizard in his eyes. Seeing myself through his lens
gave me confidence and revealed a renewed image of myself.
Thanks to my dear wife, Katia, who supported me in so many loving and
respectful ways throughout the process of writing this book. Her belief guided
me back to my self-trust so that I could continue; she helped me remove the
obstacles, again and again. Thank you, sweetie.
Finally, I must thank the wisdom of Yoga that, pouring through my life,
turned me into a humble vehicle of the universal knowledge we all abide by.
Foreword
In 1984 I was living at the Living/Dying Project in Santa Fe, New Mexico, with
my young husband, Mark. He was exploring the nature of his life and death
provoked by the extreme affliction of metastasized head and neck cancer. I was
newly married, and both the grieving wife and designated survivor. With Mark’s
death, Degriefing (Integrative Grief Therapy) was born; and my life’s work was
shown to me.
At first I questioned how I was going to continue to find meaning in my solo
journey. I asked Mark, “Who am I? Who dies? Where do you go? What am I to
do with the rest of my life?”
“Learn to love everything as you love me,” was his simply stated response. I
sought out professionals to help me learn to do that, and yet felt invisible, not
heard, not seen. I didn’t even understand how to begin to look for me. A caring
and concerned friend treated me to my first experience of truly conscious
bodywork, which helped me begin to tolerate being in my skin.
I also noted that when I coaxed my grieving body into some yoga poses, I
felt the molecular shift of my internal particles reorganizing. As an athlete,
physical education teacher, and coach I saw how the physical body not only
needs its own expression but actually demands physical release. This resets the
balance of the many interconnected complex biological systems involved in
grief. My thinking was clearer after a run, or a dance, or a swim. I saw that when
I engaged my body, I felt energized rather than drained. I was feeling a life force
inside of me resurging. How could this be? Was this okay? Would I lose my
connection with Mark if the pain started to subside? This force, this fuel, what is
it for?…To do what?…To know what? I was reappearing in a new version of my
ever-changing self.
As I was preparing to graduate from the Grief Counseling Certification
Program at the Graduate School of Professional Psychology at JFK University, I
was offered a position as the director of the first holistic health spa in the
southern cone of South America. Before departing the San Francisco Bay Area, I
stated I would manifest the most amazing yoga teacher in South America. This
statement actualized itself when Antonio interviewed for the position of yoga
instructor on the spa staff. I shared my vision of working with the bereaved and
