Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Plunges into New York

414 Pages·2012·1.84 MB·English

by  Bathroom Readers' Institute

The Bathroom Readers’ Institute
Ashland, Oregon, and San Diego, California
OUR “REGULAR”
READERS RAVE
“Before the BRI came along, I had a small library of just books. After BRI, I
now have a great library filled with incredible books.”
—Green S.
“I just happened to see one of these sitting on the back of a friend’s toilet one
time 8 years ago. Instead of reading the shampoo bottle, I picked this up. I have
been hooked every since.”
—Angela D.
“Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers are the entire reason I started collecting rubber
ducks. I have over seventy.”
—Sara C.
“My hubby was on a couple of game shows, and I know we can thank his love of
the Bathroom Reader books for the winnings.”
—Donna E.
“I have them all, and cherish every one! My 20th anniversary edition sadly fell
into the (clean) toilet. I managed to dry it out sufficiently enough to continue
reading.”
—Butch H.
“My friend in school was reading Bathroom Readers, so then I bought a couple,
and now my mom says I’m just threatening her with my intelligence.”
—Chase O.
“Your Bathroom Reader is like a high-powered flush—it sucks you in. I drink
more liquids so I can make more pit stops. Thanks for all the fun!”
—Kara D.
UNCLE JOHN’S BATHROOM
PLUNGES INTO NEW YORK
Copyright © 2011 by Portable Press. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any
manner whatsoever without written permission,
except in the case of brief quotations embodied
in critical articles or reviews.
“Bathroom Reader,” “Portable Press,” and
“Bathroom Readers’ Institute” are registered trademarks
of Baker & Taylor, Inc. All rights reserved.
For information, write…
The Bathroom Readers’ Institute P.O. Box 1117, Ashland, OR 97520
www.bathroomreader.com
e-mail: [email protected]
eISBN: 978-1-60710-651-7
E-book edition: June 2012
THANK YOU!
The Bathroom Readers’ Institute thanks the following people whose hard work,
advice, and assistance made this book possible.
Gordon Javna JoAnn Padgett Melinda Allman Lorraine Bodger Sue Steiner
Derek Fairbridge Amy Miller
Jay Newman
Michael Brunsfeld J. Carroll
Jeff Altemus Carl Lavo
Stephanie Spadaccini Thom Little Brian Boone Jenness Crawford Leslie Elman
Ryan Murphy Terri Schlichenmeyer Dan Mansfield Bonnie Vandewater John
Hogan
Beth Fhaner Amy Ly
Monica Maestas Annie Lam
Ginger Winters Mana Monzavi Jennifer Frederick Kim Griswell Sydney Stanley
David Cully Karen M. and David C.
R. R. Donnelley Nuray Celebi Bobby James Sam and Gideon Sophie and JJ
Hiya, Malia! Hiya, Mika! Hiya, Max!
CONTENTS
Because the BRI understands your reading needs, we’ve divided the contents by
length as well as subject.
Short—a quick read
Medium—2 to 3 pages
Long—for those extended visits, when something a little more involved is
required.
FUNNY PAGES
Short
You Know You’re a New Yorker When…
Hipster Spotting
Loony Laws
Comic Relief
SPORTS
Short
Smarter Than the Average Berra
The Miracle Mets
Medium
They Were Globetrotters?
If Those Bleachers Could Talk
Run, New York…Run!
Madison Square Garden Did It First
REEL LIFE
Short
Destroying New York
City Cinema
Location, Location, Location
Long
Hollywood on the Hudson
CREATURE FEATURES
Medium
Bedbugs, Bedbugs
Where the Wild Things Are
Scoop the Poop
New York’s Finest…and Tallest
Birds of a New York Feather
LIFE IS STRANGE
Medium
Pelted
I See Space People
The Naked Cowboy
IN THE NEWS
Short
Weird News
Weird News
Dumb Crooks
BUSINE$$
Short
Got Diamonds?
Medium
This Guy’s In–saaaa–ne!
Shop Till You Drop
Long
Radio City
THE WRITERS’ CORNER
Medium
The Grumpy Tourist
It’s Puzzling
Opening Lines
Between the Lions
What in the Dickens?
What in the Dickens? Part II
Long
NY ’Zines
Talk of the Town
FOOD & DRINK
Medium
Hole in One
New York Food From “A” to “P”
Bottoms Up
Ten Little Restaurants
Ten Little Restaurants, Part II
New York Food from “Q” to “Z”
Cheers for Beers
Long
Going Greenmarket
Get Your (Everything) Here!
MOUTHING OFF
Short
Talking about NYC
Street Talk
Say What?
The Donald Speaks
TOURIST TRAPS
Short
Strange Statues
Roadside Attractions
Medium
Museum Mania
The Statue of Liberty: Seven Facts
New York on $0 a Day
MUSIC
Medium
The Swingingest Borough
The Apollo
FORGOTTEN HISTORY
Medium
Ghost Stories
Searching for Utopia
Ghost Stories, Part II
Long
Steinway Village
Tenement Tales
Bienvenidos, Fidel!
Murder, He Wrote
POP-POURRI
Short
You’re My Inspiration
Uncle John’s Page of Lists
Celebrity 101
A Long Shortz List
Inside the Blue Box
Medium
Across and Down Bloopers
Art Imitates Life
For Sale: A Bridge in Brooklyn
GOVERN-MENTAL
Short
Know Your Politicians
Medium
Crooked as a Dog’s Hind Leg
Dirty Rotten Scoundrels