The Penultimate Peril (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 12)

370 Pages·2005·1.28 MB·English

by  Lemony Snicket

A Series of Unfortunate Events 
BOOK the Twelfth
THE PENULTIMATE
PERIL
by LEMONY SNICKET
Il lust ra t i ons by Brett Helquist

Dear Reader,
If this is the first book you found while searching for a
book to read next, then the first thing you should know is
that this next-to-last book is what you should put down
first. Sadly, this book presents the next-to-last chronicle
of the lives of the Baudelaire orphans, and it is next-to-
first in its supply of misery, despair, and unpleasantness.
Probably the next-to-last things you would like
to read about are a harpoon gun, a rooftop sunbathing
salon, two mysterious initials, three unidentified triplets,
a notorious villain, and an unsavory curry.
Next-to-last things are the first thing to be avoided,
and so allow me to recommend that you put this next-to-
last book down first, and find something else to read next
at last, such as the next-to-last book in another chronicle,
or a chronicle containing other next-to-last things, so that
this next-to-last book does not become the last book you
will read.
With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket
Fo r Beat ric e—
No one c ou ld e x t inguish my love,
or your house.
Contents
DEAR READER iii
iv
FOR BEATRICE—
CHAPTER ONE
Certain people have said that the world is like a… 1
CHAPTER TWO
If you were to hold this book up to a… 19
CHAPTER THREE
There are places where the world is quiet, but the… 51
CHAPTER FOUR
When the elevator finally reached the roof, and the doors… 77
CHAPTER FIVE
When the elevator reached the sixth story, Klaus
bade good-bye… 99
CHAPTER SIX
When the elevator reached the third story, Sunny
bid good-bye… 123
CHAPTER SEVEN
Quite a few things happened that day after the clock… 151
CHAPTER EIGHT
The word “denouement” is not only the name of a… 175
CHAPTER NINE
“Ha!” Count Olaf shrieked, pointing at the Baudelaire
orphans with… 205
CHAPTER TEN
“What was that?” a voice called out.… 237
CHAPTER ELEVEN
An old expression, used even before the schism, says that… 265
CHAPTER TWELVE
The man with a beard but no hair stood up… 295
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
“Ha!” Count Olaf crowed. “This takes the cake!” He was… 319
ABOUT THE AUTHOR AND ILLUSTRATOR
TO MY KIND EDITOR
A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS
CREDITS
COVER
COPYRIGHT
ABOUT THE PUBLISHER