Identity and Repartnering after Separation

263 Pages·2007·2.533 MB·English

by  Richard Lampard, Kay Peggs (auth.)

Identity and Repartnering after Separation
AlsobyRichardLampard
PRACTICALSOCIALINVESTIGATION:QualitativeandQuantitativeMethodsin
SocialResearch(withChristopherJ.Pole)
Identity and Repartnering
after Separation
Richard Lampard and Kay Peggs
©RichardLampardandKayPeggs2007
Softcover reprint of the hardcover 1st edition 2007 978-1-4039-3934-0
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LibraryofCongressCataloging-in-PublicationData
Lampard,Richard.
Identityandrepartneringafterseparation/byRichardLampardand
KayPeggs.
p. cm.
Includesbibliographicalreferencesandindex.
1. Man(cid:3)womanrelationships. 2. Interpersonalrelations. 3. Couples.
4. Remarriage. 5. Unmarriedcouples. I. Peggs,Kay,1957(cid:3) II. Title.
HQ801.L2782007
306.84“dc22 2007018262
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
16 15 14 13 12 11 10 09 08 07
Contents
ListofTables vi
Acknowledgements vii
1 Introduction 1
2 MethodsandMethodology 5
3 TheorizingContemporaryIntimateCoupleRelationshipsand
RelationshipHistories 19
4 The Formerly Married and Former Cohabitees: Their Lives,
CharacteristicsandRepartneringBehaviour 53
5 Past,PresentandFuture–OrientationstowardsRepartnering 109
6 ‘Risk’,EmotionsandChoiceintheLivesofFormerlyPartnered
MenandWomen 149
7 IdentityandIntimacyintheLivesofFormerlyPartneredMen
andWomen 176
8 TheFormerlyPartneredandRepartneringinContemporary
Britain 206
Notes 217
References 224
NameIndex 241
SubjectIndex 248
v
List of Tables
2.1 Intervieweecharacteristics 8
4.1 AgecompositionoftheGHSsampleaccordingtoprevious
maritalstatus 84
4.2 Repartneringratesbysexandpreviousmaritalstatusforthe
five-yearperiodApril1996–March2001 88
4.3 Partneringratesbysex,partnershipstatusandageforthe
five-yearperiodApril1996–March2001 89
4.4 Repartneringratesbyseparationdurationbysexforthe
five-yearperiodApril1996–March2001(durationsincelast
co-residentrelationship) 90
4.5 Themaritalstatusincombinationofpartnersbeforepartnering 97
vi
Acknowledgements
We thank Social and Community Planning Research (now the National
Centre for Social Research) and the Wellcome Trust for allowing us to use
datafromtheNationalSurveyofSexualAttitudesandLifestyles1990(Field
et al. 1995). We also thank the Office for National Statistics for permission
to use data from the General Household Survey 2001–2002 (ONS 2006b),
andfromtheONSOmnibusSurveyofApril2002(ONS2003b).
We also thank the UK Data Archive for providing us with access to the
abovedata.Noneoftheabovebodiesbearsanyresponsibilityforthefurther
analysesandinterpretationsofthesedatainthisbook.
Wewouldalsoliketothankeveryonewhohasplayedaroleinourresearch
or in the production of this book, our transcriber, and most especially the
womenandmenwhoagreedtobeinterviewed.
vii
1
Introduction
IncontemporaryBritain,highratesofmaritaldissolutionmeanthatmany
individualsspendoneormoreperiodsoftheirlivesasseparatedordivorced
people.Furthermore,therisingincidenceofcohabitationmeansthatatany
given time, in addition to formerly married people, there is a substantial
number of former cohabitees in the population. Until now, research has
tendedtofocusontheformerlymarriedratherthanonformerlypartnered
people more generally, and has also concentrated on formerly married
parents. Our book, however, is oriented towards formerly partnered people
ingeneral.Ourmainaimistoexaminetheexperiences,identities,attitudes
torepartneringandrepartneringbehaviourofformerlypartneredpeoplein
a society in which profound changes have been, and are, taking place (or,
atleast,arearguedtohavebeentakingplace)inrelationtointimatecouple
relationships. Of course, continuities in ideals relating to ‘marriage’ also
formpartofthecontextinwhichformerlypartneredpeople’sidentitiesand
orientationstowardsrelationshipsare,orarenot,revisedafterseparation,as
dotheirownrelationshiphistories.
In our research we have addressed the topics of identity and repart-
neringamongtheformerlypartneredinanappropriatelywide-rangingway,
drawing on existing substantive and theoretical literature, and carrying
out our own qualitative and quantitative analyses. This is reflected in the
structure of this book, the content of which is outlined in this intro-
ductorychapter.Ashortdescriptionoftheresearchprojectwhichultimately
led to this book is given in Chapter 2. We explain why we think it is
important to study formerly partnered people and repartnering using both
qualitativeandquantitativemethods,andoutlinethecharacteristicsofthe
sample of formerly married people and former cohabitees who took part
inin-depth,qualitativeinterviews.(Thedatausedforquantitativeanalyses
of repartnering behaviour and orientations are described in Chapter 4.)
Chapter2continuesbydiscussinghowourintervieweeswererecruited,and
by providing more detail of the content and nature of the interviews. We
then reflect on the interview process, on the implications of the nature of
1
2 IdentityandRepartneringafterSeparation
interview data for what we can learn from it about our research topic, and
onissuesarisingfromthe‘therapeutic’rolethatsomeintervieweesascribed
to the interviews. The chapter concludes by commenting on the ways in
whichweapproachedthequalitativeanalysesofourinterviewdata.
In Chapter 3 we set out a historical and theoretical context for the
analysisofourdatabyhighlightingsignificantchangesrelatingtointimacy
and couple relationships in the late twentieth century and by examining
the theoretical literature on changing couple relationships. Unsurprisingly,
given the decline in marriage and marital stability and a greater diversity
amongcontemporaryrelationships,theoreticalaccountsemphasizechange.
In ‘high modernity’, societies such as Britain are said to be characterized
by a greater level of individualism, which has contributed to a detradi-
tionalization of intimacy. A key feature of contemporary relationships is
said to be choice, more specifically the freedom to leave an unsatisfactory
relationship. In Chapter 3 we discuss the work of Giddens, Bauman, Beck
andBeck-Gernsheim,andGross(amongothers),highlightingtherelevance
of concepts such as love, self-identity, commitment and insecurity. The
viewsofsuchauthorsontheorigins,extentanduniversalityofthechanges
vary,andsomeregardthechangeslesspositivelythanothersdo,butthere
appearstobeaconsensuswithintheirworkthatcontemporarycouplerela-
tionships are less permanent and less clearly (or narrowly) defined; hence
formerly partnered people are repartnering in a rather unpredictable (and
henceperhaps‘risky’)context.
ThesubstantivefocusofChapter4ismorelimited,asweconcentrateon
theformerlypartneredandrepartnering,documentinginthefirstsectionof
thechapterwhatisknownaboutthesetopicsfromearlierresearch.Forthe
mostpartwerestrictourattentiontoBritain,butwealsodrawonkeyNorth
American studies that contain important findings and valuable conceptual
material. The studies examined exhibit some recurring (and overlapping)
themes:theheterogeneityofformerlypartneredpeopleandtheirlives,ambi-
guitywithinthelivesofparticularindividuals,variousformsofmarginality
thatarecommonbutnotuniversal,changesrelatingtoidentityandtheself,
issues of independence and control, and experiences of constraints. Often
linkedtothesethemesandofsignificanceinitsownrightistheimpactof
pastrelationships.Thefirstsectionofthechapterconcludeswithasummary
of existing knowledge about repartnering orientations and behaviour. The
second section consists of new quantitative analyses of social survey data
thatupdateorextendbeyondearlierresearchontheformerlypartneredand
repartnering; the analyses pay greater attention to former cohabitees, and
cohabitation in general, than most other studies, and include an examina-
tion of non-resident couple or sexual relationships and an examination of
repartneringorientations.
We then move on to analyses based on our interviews with formerly
partneredpeople.Chapter5providesanoverviewoftherepartneringorient-
ations of our interviewees and includes material relating to aspects of their