Table Of Contenthey admissionsmom:
real talk from reddit
a no-nonsense, unconventional
approach to college admissions
Carolyn Allison Caplan
(aka u/admissionsmom)
and the users of r/ApplyingToCollege
Hey AdmissionsMom: Real Talk from Reddit
Copyright © 2019 by AdmissionsMom, LLC
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced
or used in any manner what so ever without the express written permission
of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Printed in the United States of America
Second Printing, 2020
ISBN - 978-1-7337641-1-7 (Hardcover)
ISBN - 978-1-7337641-4-8 (Digital)
AdmissionsMom, LLC
Houston, TX
www.admissionsmom.college
The author has tried to reproduce the questions, advice, and interactions
with students as closely as possible to the original engagements on /r/
ApplyingToCollege; however, in some cases the language has been edited
or paraphrased for consistency, clarity, and/or to accommodate space
constraints. Permission was graciously given by each of the contributors
whose questions and posts are reproduced in this book. The author has tried
her best to credit to those contributors whose engagements with the author
allowed her to write this book. At each contributor’s preference, the author
has used their name or Reddit nickname, when appropriate. In some
instances, the author has changed names, content, and/or nicknames to
protect the identities of those who requested to remain anonymous. The
author does not make any guarantee that following the advice, instruction,
or direction provided in this book will result in any specific achievement or
goal including, but not limited to, acceptance into a specific college,
university, or degree program. Rather, the author hopes that the reader will
find support in the shared experiences of others and learn to appreciate the
process of applying to college for what it is: a journey.
Book Interior and E-book Design by Amit Dey | [email protected]
Cover Design by Sara Rose Caplan | [email protected]
for mom
Contents
Intro ..............................................ix
Chapter 1: Just the Basics ............................ 1
Chapter 2: P repping for College Admissions – Juniors
and Seniors .............................. 15
Chapter 3: Course Rigor and Class Selection ............ 27
Chapter 4: It’s All About the GPA and Class Rank, or Is It? . 35
Chapter 5: To SAT or ACT? — That Is the Question ...... 41
Chapter 6: T est Scores — Report, Understand,
and Make Peace with Them ................ 49
Chapter 7: Activities, ECs, and Summers, Oh My! ........ 59
Chapter 8: Letters of Recommendation ................. 79
Chapter 9: Why Include a Resume? ................... 89
Chapter 10. What to Study? Choosing a Major ............ 95
Chapter 11: Rankings Schmankings ................... 105
Chapter 12: I Don’t Believe in Dream Schools – Finding
Your Fit ............................... 113
Chapter 13: L iberal Arts Colleges: The Best Little
Schools You’ve Never Heard Of ............ 123
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vi Hey AdmissionsMom: Real Talk from Reddit
Chapter 14: L ook for the Vibe and Find Your Tribe:
Campus Visits. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 129
Chapter 15: EA, ED, RD, SCEA, REA ................. 137
Chapter 16: Figuring Out the Finances ................. 147
Chapter 17: The Personal Essay Topic? You. ........... 159
Chapter 18: Supplemental Whaaats? More Essays... ...... 181
Chapter 19: Tell Us More –The Additional Info Essay .... 189
Chapter 20: The Yucky Parts — Disciplinary Infractions .. 195
Chapter 21: Showing Colleges Some Love — Demonstrated
Interest ................................ 199
Chapter 22: Up Close and Personal: The Interview ....... 205
Chapter 23: Taming the Admissions Stress Monster ...... 215
Chapter 24: Grow Your Attitude of Gratitude ............ 227
Chapter 25: Mindfulness – An Admissions Journey with
Intention .............................. 239
Chapter 26: Dealing with Your Parents ................ 247
Chapter 27: Hello, Parents. This is just for you. ......... 253
Chapter 28: W hen It Doesn’t Go Your Way: The Pain of
Rejection .............................. 269
Chapter 29: Hanging in Limbo — The Uncomfortable
World of Being Waitlisted and Deferred ...... 285
Chapter 30: Taking a Gap Year ....................... 295
Chapter 31: You Did It! Acceptances .................. 299
Chapter 32: International Students – Coming to America .. 309
Contents vii
Chapter 33: Transfers .............................. 313
Chapter 34: Veterans — Thank You for Your Service ...... 319
Chapter 35: T here’s a Place for You: LGBTQ and
First-Gen/Low-Income (including foster
kids and homeless students) ................ 325
Chapter 36: P repping for College Admissions —
Freshmen and Sophomores ................ 333
Chapter 37: Advice and Updates from Our Community .... 339
Gen Z Glossary .................................... 351
Resources ........................................ 357
Shout Outs ........................................ 371
Acknowledgements ................................. 375
A-Mom’s Mom Club. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 377
About Carolyn ..................................... 379
Intro
who am I?
No, this isn’t an esoteric personal statement, but it is an introduc-
tion. I did just kind of plop myself onto Reddit one day, and then
I started spilling advice without telling anyone who I was. Let’s
start over.
Hi! I’m AdmissionsMom, and I’m an English teacher, a mom,
an independent educational consultant (basically a private col-
lege counselor), and a moderator on the subreddit r/ApplyingTo-
College. I call myself AdmissionsMom because that’s the role I
want to play on r/ApplyingToCollege and in this book. When high
school kids come to Reddit looking for advice about the college
admissions process, I try to offer help and guidance. With this
book, I want to smooth those admissions-ruffled feathers and help
many of you relax about your college admissions journey while
offering advice — both my own and that of many others on our
subreddit.
my goals
You might be starting this process. You may be in the middle of
your senior year. You may be a year away from applying. You may
be a parent wondering how to help your child get into college.
Whoever you are, I want to help you navigate this journey mind-
fully and with as little stress as possible.
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x Hey AdmissionsMom: Real Talk from Reddit
I want to help students step into their independent selves with
confidence. I want to offer you tips about how to get into college
and, more importantly, how to go about leading a happy, healthy,
and productive life while applying to college (and beyond). All
too often, I see a tsunami of anxiety crashing into high schools and
overwhelming countless kids. Instead of focusing on who they
are, what they want from life, and how college should fit their
goals, kids are running themselves ragged trying to turn them-
selves into someone they think colleges want (spoiler alert: that is
the opposite of what they want).
The problem is that, in any given year, around 50,000 stu-
dents are trying to funnel themselves into the same tiny teacup
of colleges. And that’s just not going to work. There are literally
hundreds of amazing schools that are actively seeking all kinds of
students — you simply need to find the one (or more!) out of the
many that fit you.
Look, I know there’s a lot of pressure to perform. And I’m
aware that not everyone has access to the same resources. You
might be stuck in a crappy school with less than great teachers.
You may be the first person in your family to think about col-
lege. You may feel overwhelmed by the whole process. But guess
what? You are the determining factor — the captain of your ship.
College marks the beginning of your life in a way that you’ve
never experienced before.
This is an awesome opportunity. Don’t freak out.
Instead, ask yourself: What do I want out of life when I leave
high school? What do I see for myself?
You don’t have to know for sure. Sure, the best college appli-
cations come from students who have a clear idea of themselves,
but sometimes that clear idea of themselves can be that they’re
unsure about what that idea is. It’s ok to be confused and uncertain
in high school. That’s what being a teenager is all about.
